There's a certain energy that people are referring to when they use the word "jerk" "asshole" or "jackass."
It expresses the frustration of not being able to penetrate the other person's mask~ shield. It's the frustration of dealing with someone who's heart is closed and they have made themselves unreachable. No amount of talking, no display of emotion, no appeal for emotion or connection can break through. No words of reason, and not even the best creative efforts can penetrate this shield. It's as fruitful as trying to get your computer to Love you. People can feel it when their words and efforts are in vain~~ and the frustration of bumping up against this futility can be profound and intense.
Never is there a place or time where this is more glaringly and painfully explored than in a romantic Love relationship.
I have been fighting this battle personally on my homefront, especially since April, when my Love closed his heart to me. I have been trying to reconnect with him in every way that I know how since, only to find myself in no man's land. It is an empty and painful place to be. I think I am not alone in saying that one often starts to question how Lovable they are, when they are no longer being Loved, wondering if one's appearance is up to snuff, or if there is something that they can do or change about themselves so that their Loved one will Love them again. I found myself wondering if there someone else-- someone else he was becoming attracted to? Wanting to be with?? I wondered how he could say things that were so cold, so unfeeling... and not connect with me at all.
After an agonizing break up, in a storm of raging emotions: sad, grieving, hurt, frustrated and disgusted, I finally went to the one place that there is to go when there is no where else to go.
I went to God.
All that I could do, and what I knew that I needed to do was to Surrender. "I surrender, I surrender, I surrender..." I repeated. I was met by the most lovely energy and white light. I felt like I'd been tucked in for the night. Finally, a smile came across my face.
I wanted to just enjoy this moment, and drink it in, but God was talking to me, and telling me something about my relationship, and about this closed-hearted energy. I wasn't sure that I wanted to listen, as I was having a break of feeling good and didn't want to upset it. I was feeling so fragile and vulnerable.
However, I was curious as to what He had to say, I had so many unanswered questions. I figured that I could listen for a few minutes and see what He had to say. If I needed some more time before hearing it, I could always tell Him.
He was showing me what it looked like-- this impenetrable, closed-Heartedness. It was literally like metal, a shiny, thin, silver layer, just beneath the skin. "NOT HUMAN" he said, and I understood that-- in that moment, a person is truly not dealing with a human being. That was exactly what it felt like. It was an awful feeling!
This energy was from the earth and literally in the earth. I could see that it was mostly affecting the earth people, those with brown hair and eyes~~ those whose First Origin was on earth (although people with this DNA now emanate from many origins). In fact, I have known for a while now that it is not a coincidence that the three biggest heartbreaks of my Life were all with men who had brown hair & eyes, but I didn't know why that was until today. I would observe when their hearts were closed that there eyes would darken. I would wonder, where had those lovely, amber tones gone?
I asked if this was something I should clear immediately, but I got that it was better to sleep first and to have a friend help me in the morning.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
However, I was curious as to what He had to say, I had so many unanswered questions. I figured that I could listen for a few minutes and see what He had to say. If I needed some more time before hearing it, I could always tell Him.
He was showing me what it looked like-- this impenetrable, closed-Heartedness. It was literally like metal, a shiny, thin, silver layer, just beneath the skin. "NOT HUMAN" he said, and I understood that-- in that moment, a person is truly not dealing with a human being. That was exactly what it felt like. It was an awful feeling!
This energy was from the earth and literally in the earth. I could see that it was mostly affecting the earth people, those with brown hair and eyes~~ those whose First Origin was on earth (although people with this DNA now emanate from many origins). In fact, I have known for a while now that it is not a coincidence that the three biggest heartbreaks of my Life were all with men who had brown hair & eyes, but I didn't know why that was until today. I would observe when their hearts were closed that there eyes would darken. I would wonder, where had those lovely, amber tones gone?
I asked if this was something I should clear immediately, but I got that it was better to sleep first and to have a friend help me in the morning.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
I woke with a smile on my face and feeling so warm and groovy! Then, as I came to wakefulness, there was an awful, constrictive feeling in my head and especially the teeth in the front, and a taste of tin in my mouth. In my wonderful dreams, I had forgotten about my current circumstances until I saw the shape that my room was in… a disaster.
Oh yeah, come to think of it, so was my relationship. In fact, it was worse than that. It was over.
I called my awesome compadre and described this cold, steely, closed-ness to her and she knew what I was talking about. She had seen her Love the same way. We both agreed that this was predominantly affecting males, but not exclusively.
She felt that this originated from some event, and I did too. I had been shown a scene of a mob of people running for their Lives, and it looked like they were running from a natural disaster.
The people were stocky— shorter than most people are now— and all had dark hair, light brown skin and dark eyes. They were running from something.
She said that she felt that it had to do with fear, and I felt that too. The scene that I had now been shown several times was certainly one of a people filled with fear.
Then she interjected and told me the dream that she had last night. She had seen a woman making a ball of some sort—in the process of creation. When she said it, I could see it too. For a moment, I thought that the woman might be me, and I got a “no.” I asked if it was someone that we knew and got a “yes.” I asked if it was my friend and got a “yes”.
I smiled and told her about these questions and answers and she said that she thought that I might say that. She saw and felt something that I hadn't, how this was actually something connected to the Heart, in front of it, and it moved up to the right side of the head. As soon as she said that, I saw it. It was a translucent white ball with a tail to the Heart, it moved up and made another ball in front of the throat, and then again, up and making another ball in front of the right side of the head. I got that this was about POWER. That the woman had done this to gain power.
And again, I saw the scene, but much more of it. I could see that this was from the time of the separation of the Twins, and the male had gotten so far on his creation on his own that he had actually made people. The people only knew him as their creator, and she had been cut out entirely.
Her last-ditch effort to be a part of this creation and to work in unison with him again~ (and as a reflection of the fear of separation that she was feeling) she thought if she could make the people fear her, than they would know her and know her power and they would acknowledge her as a Creator.
She created this ball in front of their Hearts, it affected the throat, as it is the creative chakra, and also the right side of the head, which she put into the people. In an awesome display of her power, she used a thunderbolt and struck it into the earth. This fear energy went into the earth, where it has been to this day.
The male was deeply saddened by this act, as he immediately recognized that it came from fear, but also that it had come from her hand, and not her womb. He knew that she had forgotten the power of her womb, she no longer trusted her power and this was not an act of faith. (Women ever since then have forgotten this power and separated from it).
In fact, I felt my crown chakra had sealed off, as creating from fear is not in unison with the Grand Organized Designer, GOD. Nor is it of the highest, nor is it the most effective, nor is it much fun. Creating from fear is like pulling teeth.
When one is Creating in Love, it just happens. It's easy. It flows~~ Those are our only two choices here, Creating from a place of fear, or Love. ♥
More potent than his sadness, was his ANGER!! A gale of anger went from him to her~~ not only from asserting herself into his creation, but especially because she had done it in this way (from fear and not in the highest). This was an immediate karmic lesson of the returns of creating from fear, usually what we create is a shitstorm (for lack of a better word). This would be their last interaction, and the end of their relationship. Her Heart was broken.
He tried to remove this creation, but found that he could not. He realized that she was more powerful than him, and he did not like this realization. To protect himself from her, he sealed himself and his Heart off from her. He did this to the people as well. While it seemed like a good idea, ironically, the shield kept Love out, which is the only remedy for fear. It had the power to go up and down, but when people felt fear, they would shield themselves, and it was in those moments that they needed to be open to Love the most!!
It was done. The people DID fear her (and still fear women and their power to this day). And many men have still carried this anger towards women to this day as well. Because this fear was in the earth, it was especially hard to escape from, and has grown over time in the many visitors here as well as the original ones. It has become an enormous part of the earth experience.
These shields have been dropped. Fear of the female is being transmuted, as is the anger towards her. The ball of fear has been removed from where it was. Once again, our Hearts open fully to Love and to Life! Once again, we are reminded to Create from the place of Love, not of fear.
Women are being reminded to use the Creative Power of their Wombs to Create the Life that is their Heart's Desire, in the highest and best for All!! Whispers on the wind tell the wombs everywhere to bring in the New World Energy!! As all of our wombs work in Unison~~ just WATCH how quickly the New World Emerges!!! *:)☮♥✿
#BlessedBe#SeeYouInNewEden
Mitakuye Oyasin ~ Aloha ~ Shalom ~ Namaste ~ Malama 'Aina ~ Malama Kakou ~ Malama Pono
I Love You! ♥
I Love YOU!!! :) <3
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